


Exam Time

by Julia_Writes



Series: One Shots of the OT4 [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anxiety, College, College AU, Comfort, Library, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mother Hen!Hercules honestly, Multi, Panic Attacks, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-29
Updated: 2017-01-29
Packaged: 2018-09-20 17:58:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9503405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Julia_Writes/pseuds/Julia_Writes
Summary: Alexander is studying for the finals and his signifs are worried





	

            “Has anyone seen Alex since the weekend?” John asked over breakfast on Wednesday. Lafayette and Hercules both shook their heads.

“I hadn’t really noticed until he messaged last night saying he wouldn’t make it today,” said Hercules. “I’ve been pretty busy working for finals.”

“I think this is the longest I’ve not seen him since last Christmas,” said Lafayette, nodding. “He’s probably also working for finals.”  
“That’s what I’m afraid of,” John said. “I ran in to Burr earlier. He said Alex slept in the dorm on Monday night for less than four hours and that he hadn’t even bothered going back there yesterday night. Burr said he’d said he was going to the library.”  
“That 24 hour library is the worst thing to have happened to Alex, I swear to God,” Hercules said, already standing up and putting his jacket on. “I’m gonna get a bagel and an orange juice to go, you guys pack up the food. We’ll go bring him back to my dorm; Madison’s gone home for the week.”

 

            When the three of them pulled up to the library, there were dozens of students wandering in and out. Classes were out for the weeks leading up to finals and there were clearly some people who hadn’t quiet realized how quickly the semester was coming to an end. Inside the library was chaos; the usually silent building was alive with the general hubbub of people. Every table was full, with some people opting to sit on the floor and a general hum of noise was around as people whispered to each other, seeking explanations of topics or a comparison of mock test answers.

            It was Lafayette who spotted Alex first. He was sitting on his own at the back, almost hidden behind a massive stack of law books. There were various wrappers of energy bars around him, as well as three empty cups of coffee.

“Alex?” Lafayette said softly, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder, who, up until that point, hadn’t noticed them. He jumped, but relaxed when he saw who it was, blinking rapidly.

“Hey guys, sorry about breakfast, just really busy. I’ll see you all later though, ok?” Alex barely looked up to address them, focusing instead on the incredibly dense text in front of him. The other three looked at each other with concern.

“Actually, Alex, we were thinking that maybe you needed a break. How long have you been here?” John asked, moving the books so that he could sit up on the table.

“Oh I’m alright, I slept in the dorm yesterday, I’ll go back a little later, yeah?”  
“No you didn’t, Alex, it’s Wednesday. You’ve only left here for a few hours since Sunday, haven’t you?” Hercules said, trying not to sound too accusing.

“There’s a lot to do, Herc,” said Alex, as he made a vague gesture at where his books had been – evidently, he hadn’t noticed that John had moved them.

“Alex, these notes don’t even make sense anymore,” Lafayette said, looking over their boyfriend’s shoulder. “You need proper sleep, this isn’t helping you at all.”

“No!” exclaimed Alex, before pausing for a second. When he spoke again, it was with a shaky sense of control. “I’m fine, guys. Really. And I have a lot of work to do, so if you guys don’t mind, I’d like to get back to it.”

“Actually, we do mind,” said John, taking the book that Alex was reading away from him, ignoring the cry of protest. “This isn’t healthy, ‘Lex. You gotta get some food and some sleep. You probably need a shower. You also need to not spend 24 hours studying.”

“John, give me the book back,” Alex said, his voice cracking. “I don’t have time for this.”

“I’ll give it back in twelve hours, when you’ve taken a proper break,” John said, putting it in his bag. All three were surprised to see Alex slump back in to his chair, seemingly giving up.

“Fine. I’ll go home.” He said, standing up. When he did stand up, he swayed slightly, holding his head. Hercules didn’t hesitate, picking up his smallest boyfriend bridal style, like he weighed nothing at all. John and Lafayette looked at each other, confused.

“He’s not ok at all, is he?” whispered John. Lafayette shook their head.

“He gave up way too easily. We’ll keep an eye on him, I guess.”

 

            Alex’s ‘calm’ attitude lasted until they got to the car. John had already sat down in the backseat, so Hercules lay Alex down next to him, with Alex’s head in John’s lap. Hercules and Lafayette had just sat down in the front when John noticed Alex shaking.

“’Lex, what’s wrong?” In response, Alex seemed only to shrink in to himself, hiding his face in John’s lap. When Hercules closed his door, the slam made Alex jump. “What’s going on babe? We can’t help you if you won’t tell us.”  
“I’m going to fail my exams, John,” he mumbled. “I can’t afford to take this time off, I need to be working.”

“Love, you’re not going to remember anything if you keep working like that,” John replied, motioning for Hercules to drive. “You need to take breaks. You know that you know the stuff, you’ve worked all year. It’s just about refreshing, not learning, or forgetting by completely overwhelming yourself.” John started stroking Alex’s hair, who was curled up completely, visibly shaking now.

“The exams are next week, John, I gotta be ready and I can’t afford breaks – I’ll study in my dorm if you want, but I need to learn that book, so just give it back, you have no actual right to take it from me-“

“Alex!” John interrupted, cutting Alex’s panicked ramble off before it grew too loud. “Calm down, you’ll be ok, just breathe, come on.” Alex, however, either was ignoring John or had just stopped hearing him. His breaths were getting quicker and quicker and he was still shaking. He was panicking. John looked up at his other partners; Hercules was focused on the road, but John could see his concern in the rear view mirror. Lafayette was watching Alex worriedly.

“He’s having a panic attack,” Lafayette said. John kept stroking Alex’s hair, feeling completely out of his depth.

“Yes, but how do we help him?” Hercules asked, pulling the car in to a parking spot outside his dorms. Quick as a flash, Lafayette clambered in to the back seat.

“Alex, can you hear me?” They asked. “Just nod if you can.” After a brief pause, Alex nodded. “Ok, that’s great babe. So I’m just going to count, ok, and we’re gonna breath together. Do you think you can manage that?” Another nod, less certain. “Ok, in - un, deux, trois, quatre, fixer, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix – and out again - un, deux, trois, quatre, fixer, six, sept, huit, neuf, dix. Well done, babe, again.” Lafayette continued until Alex had calmed down, while John and Hercules sat quietly by and waited. Eventually, the shaking stopped and Alex’s breathing was calm again. With a nod from Lafayette, Hercules got out and lifted Alex from John’s lap. The small man was already nodding off. By the time they got up to Hercules’ dorm, he was fast asleep.

Alex slept for a solid twelve hours. He wandered into Hercules’ living room at midnight, where everyone else was cuddled on the sofa, watching The Little Mermaid.

“Alex!” Lafayette cried when they saw him. “Come join us, we just started.” They patted the sofa beside them.

“No thanks, Laf, I gotta get back to the library-“

“As if we’d let you go back now, Alex,” Hercules said, interrupting him. He stood up. “It’s midnight and you still haven’t eaten anything. I made pasta earlier, let me get you some.” Alex opened his mouth to protest, but Hercules stopped him. “Alex, sit down and watch the film. You’re not going anywhere.” He kissed his forehead and went in to the kitchen, the conversation clearly, in his mind, finished. Alex flopped down on to the sofa between John and Lafayette, trying to let Ariel’s singing distract him but, by the time Hercules had returned with a piping hot bowl of pasta, Alex could already feel the panic taking over his body again. He barely even noticed when John paused the film and sat up. Next thing he knew was Lafayette counting again, telling him to breathe along and, fifteen minutes later, he opened his eyes to see his two boyfriend and significant other looking at him, full of concern.

“’Lex, we gotta talk about this,” Hercules said, cautiously. “This isn’t healthy, babe. What’s got you so stressed?” For the first time in a long time, Alex felt lost for words.

“I just- I- These exams have to go well.” He managed.

“You’re top of your class, ‘Lex.” John replied. “You know what you’re doing. The only thing that’s gonna ruin these exams for you is if you run out of steam before they start.”

“Which is going to happen very soon if you keep going the way you are.” Lafayette interjected.

“I’m scared I’m going to lose the scholarship,” Alex blurted out. “And if that happens, then I have to leave, and then I lose you guys, and you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. So I’ve got to do well.”

“Even if you did lost the scholarship, by some inhumane act of injustice, you wouldn’t lose us. We’re not going anywhere, babe,” Hercules said, moving to take Alex’s hand. “That I can promise you.” Beside him, John and Lafayette nodded. “And, tomorrow, when you go back to the library, one of us will go with you. We all have to do some studying, so we’ll do it together, ok? And we’ll make sure that you’re not wearing yourself out too much, and then you’ll ace all of your exams, and we’ll have an amazing summer together, ok?” Alex swallowed and nodded, smiling slightly.

“I love you guys.”

“We love you too, mon amour,” said Lafayette, smiling. The four of them returned to The Little Mermaid and, by the time the priest had married Ariel and Eric, al four were fast asleep, curled up on the couch.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, first of all, because I know nothing of the American College system!
> 
> I wrote this because I like to project my own feelings on to characters and Alexander's anxiety is exactly how I feel. During my Leaving Cert - final school exams - my dad came up to my room at one in the morning to try and drag me away from my Classics books which resulted in a panic attack and me sobbing for a lot of the night. To calm me down, he put a bunch of videos on from Hamilton at the Tonys, despite his hatred of all things musicals, which was sweet.
> 
> Anyway! Comment and let me know what you think! xxx


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